TacoTaco! BurrrrrritoBurrito!

So I've put myself on this post-Hong Kong diet of eating a salad per day.

Generally I eat two meals a day, plus cereal.

If one of my meals is a salad (which one MUST be, according to my diet), I'm allowed to eat anything I want (within reason) for my second meal. Buffets are still only allowed once a month.

It's been going well.

For the past 4 days I have had a salad and a reasonably sensible other meal (plus cereal).

Today...

Today...........

Well. Today, Christian happened.

Christian and TL really.

TL convinced me to go get Thai food with her and eat my salad for dinner.

Fine.

Then Christian came after work and convinced me to go to Baja Fresh.

.........hmmmm.......

We got to Baja Fresh. And ooooohhhhh I so wanted a Burrito Ultimo.

But my conscience won and I wordered the Baja Ensalada Chicken Salad (is that redundant?).

Fatass, (and we are only allowed to call him Fatass to his face because, well, he's still kind of hot) ordered not one, but TWO Fajita Burritos.

These fuckers are so big THEY'RE NOT EVEN ON THE MENU.

They're rice, beans, chicken AND steak, grilled peppers and onions, sour cream, and some big fatty slices of avocado all rolled into a thick giant double-wrapped tortilla the size of a football.

Christian ate one and saved one for "later".

"Later", as it turns out, was when we got into the car and were stopped at a traffic light.

Being diabetic (and fat), Christian decided we needed to stop at a gas station to buy some Reese's, protein bars, and Frappucinos. "Half good, half bad," as he put it.

Hate to break it to you buddy, but after a Baja Fresh Fajita Burrito, EVERYTHING is bad.

......Sooooo.....Christian went into the gas station to pick up his junk and left his half-eaten burrito on the dashboard.

He slammed the door. It started to fall in slow motion.

I lunged forward and saved it.

Phew!

Grasping the warm delicious burrito in my hand, I was overcome with an urge like no other.

I gently brought the sweet meaty treat to my lips.

And devoured it savagely.

(As a favor to Christian, obviously.)