I die.

Bjoern shot Casper Van Dien's headshots the other day (you may remember him from Starship Troopers and not much else) and they are incredible, as would be expected.

The Wedding!

So apparently there was a crazed fan/wedding crasher who took unauthorized photos which you can see here.

I flew to Dallas to shoot the wedding last minute because Bjoern was doing the photos and when I heard this I had literally just watched a clip from Supernatural at the gym the day before so I knew exactly who Jensen was.

The show looks great. And funny!



So Bjoern asked me to come help with the wedding and I figured I'd go and help and take some beautiful pictures for my portfolio.



I looked at last-minute flights. They started at $800, but it would totally have been worth it. But then I realized that even when flights are that expensive you can just use airline miles to get the flight for cheaper! (I paid 25,000 AA miles for a flight that would have cost me $825.)

Hooray!

It was pretty surreal that I was admiring the beauty of the groom and his co-star/best friend Jared one day...





As well as that of the bride and her costars/assumed bridesmaids...



...And then a couple days later I'm jetting off to see them on one of the most special days of their lives!

Surreal and EPIC!




The fact that Jared is only an inch shorter than me = instant besties.



I only have Bjoern to thank for not only inviting me, but for being the greatest most-inspiring photographer, mentor, and friend and for teaching me everything I know.



I owe my entire career and lifestyle to him! Thank you Bjoern forever and ever!!!

Congrats D&J!!!!

More ego boost! / Thank You

Got a really nice email from my #1 fan Gabe today. (or maybe #2, DannyHong are you still out there??? Canadiasian fanboys?!?!?)

-------------------------------------

from Gabe G [gabeg@gmail.com]
to DK [DK@gmail.com]
date Wed, Apr 22, 2009 at 8:35 PM
subject Headshot advice and your blog

Hey Dennis,

A couple hundred of my 3 billion cousins are seniors this year and have asked me for some portraits/headshots.

I don't actually have that much experience with headshots, as I do mostly photojournalism and concept stuff, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to ask a master. I was hoping to see if you had any tips. Like lighting, or lens preference....or how you get the background so blurry. Anything would do.

Also, I wanted to mention on why I was so eager to meet you and why I love your blog so much (other than the fact that it is hilarious). Its mostly because I came across your blog when I was at a major crossroads in my life. I had finally decided that law school was not the right choice for me and was questioning whether or not to pursue something involving photography, which I love. Which is why I am such a loyal reader of your blog.

Something happened to you that made you dive right into photography and your success on everything since then has been really inspirational. So I left my nice job, took a trip around the world and have decided to pursue photography. I am looking to move from Seattle (maybe), and am considering going to LA or SF, taking a couple of classes and go from there. Not really sure if it will work for me or not, but your blog really did help me a lot in making this decision.
So thanks for that ;)

I wanted to take the opportunity, if we had met, to ask you questions revolving around what kind of obstacles you faced. The advice you had on getting a job with a professional photographer and any advice you had on starting your own business and getting the word out there. Sadly, my time in New York was spent in family chaos or being hungover so sorry I never got the chance to meet.

I am going to LA in May to check it out. Maybe Ill get another chance then.

I am not good at writing emails, but overall, I just really wanted to say what a great read your blog has been :)

Gabe

-------------------------------------

Wasn't that nice?

I mean. I am all about funemployment, but please don't all go quitting your jobs because of me.

But Gabe, you're doing well with it. Keep it up!

I am so thankful to all of you out there who have inspired and supported me as well over the past several years. As I begin a new phase of my epic life journey, I guess now is as good a time as any to send out some thank yous to the people who have had the greatest impact on me. Like Bjoern, without whom my sick nasty life would not be possible. Or Dad, (and a little bit of my retarded Nigerian-scam-artist-loving Mom) also whom without my sick nasty life would not be possible. Kristy Euge DrDan and (I think) MrsDrDan who have sat down to dinner with me and set me in the right direction whenever I've been quarterlife crisis-ing and have been supersupportive ever since. MAO whose fun and beauty and gift-giving abilities transcend time and space. And Felly Steph Ashwin Shiri and TL who allowed me to keep the bicoastal dream alive.

There are so many people to thank and obviously I can't fit you all in here. Well actually that is a lie because it is my blog and it is the internets and not that Academy Awards so I can ramble for as long as I want. So fine. Thank you to all my beautiful clients for keeping a roof over my head and a plane ticket in my pocket. And thank you Smershy Goony Heidi KG Narni Kaystyles Teebags Danny Matty Yeebee Annie (who is totally MIA)... as off-and-on BFFs you all have been a great source of support and photographic fun over the years and I look forward to so many more!

P.S. I'm drunk.

Bjoern's camera

So Bjoern let me borrow his digital camera, which is totally sweet.

You probably can't tell the difference.

But I can.

And WOOOOO!!!!

Pretty pretty Christian wedding.

We shot a wedding yesterday.

Although it was a super-Christian ceremony, everything about it was pretty much perfect.

Almost everyone in the church cried when two amazing singer people and a choir sang Celine Dion/Andrea Bocelli's "The Prayer".

The reception was held at the Victorian over on Main St. in Santa monica. We stole the couple for a few minutes and tossed them in the middle of the street and got some rocking shots.

Bjoern is one talented mofo.

1st '07 Wedding!

Yesterday, Bjoern and I went down to Palos Verdes to shoot the wedding of his headshot clients Allison, a former FHM model, and Dave, a stuntman.

Everyone there was pretty, fun, and really nice.

It's cool to see people who have made a pretty remarkable living doing the more overlooked behind-the-scenes stuff in Hollywood. The groom and his groomsmen were all pretty big-time Hollywood stuntmen. (Dave, the groom, was Brad Pitt's stunt double in Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Fight Club and is currently Matt Damon's double in The Bourne Ultimatum.)

It was a really beautiful setting.




There were cupcakes...



And creepy little children...



And a breathtaking view.



Later there was drinking and dancing and the most delicious wedding food EVER.

Good times had by all.

Headshots!

Since Wustein recently found a commercial agent and has been going on random auditions, I decided why not just get my headshots done and see if anyone wants to submit me for the giant random Asian roles that I'm sure must be out there somewhere. I mean, it's slightly more productive than WoWing...

Plus getting into the acting/auditioning scene will inevitably lead to more photo clients...it's really a win/win.

So yesterday I went over to Bjoern's for some work and play and told him my new little project.

We goofed around and he did some headshots for me and Franzi ("Francie"), the family friend who is staying with him for the next six months.



Woot woot free $800 headshots...

WE BOOKED OUR FIRST WEDDING!!!!

The site has only been up a week and a random woman called and said she saw it and cried and had to have us at her wedding.

Bjoern called me to tell me he loves me.

And I love him.

Ohhhh this is going to be such a long wonderful partnership.

Spider fun.

I helped Bjoern move yesterday. We're taking everything out of his little studio, where he's lived for the past ten years, and moving it to an awesome little hilltop house in Los Feliz.

He cooked me lunch. Which was really cute because it was a total boy-cooked lunch. Pasta with sauce. I thought the effort was very sweet.

Also, a giant black spider crawled slowly down my arm while we were moving.

I couldn't do anything about it because I was in the middle of carrying a large cardboard box of very expensive stuff with Bjoern.

It was terrifying. It was horrible.

And the worst part is, I didn't want Bjoern to know I was scared of spiders.

So I closed my eyes, quickened my pace (nearly causing BJ to trip backwards over his feet), and screamed quietly into my soul.

Bjoern Bjoern Bjoern. I love Bjoern.

Today I went to CompUSA and picked up my computer.

Trouble is I think the dude forgot to install the extra memory I requested. So...this piece of shit is running super slow. And I mean super. S-U-U-U-UUUUU-PER.

Like I-typed-these-letters-26-seconds-ago and-they-are-just-now-showing-up-on-this-here-screen slow.

I might have to take it back in. Oh god. Please don't make me do it.

.................

Got to Bjoern's at 2pm after visiting the Shakey's Pizza buffet.

Yes. I went alone. I have a problem.

Proceeded to watch seven straight episodes of "Lost: Season Two" while "working". Bjoern needed about 438 super-high-quality shots uploaded and had me watch the episodes, which he had downloaded from iTunes, in the interim.

Getting paid $20/hour tax-free to watch the best show EVER?

My job kicks so much ass.

Master of my own (and several other people's) destiny...

Bjoern called me after dinner this evening to ask me to go over to his place to check out the proofs from the GodHead shoot. The pictures were SICK. I wish I could show them to you. But unfortunately I cannot.

I now have a renewed confidence in my photography career and am very excited to get my computer back from the shop and finish getting my shit together. (It's getting a total overhaul: 250 GB hard drive, Dual DVD burners, 1 Gig of RAM.) VERY VERY EXCITING.

.................



Earlier today I did alumni interviews for a couple of kids who are applying to Brown.

The first was Lame Orchestral Susan.

Short and awkward phone interview. As she stuttered her way through her boring-ass answers I could just see the sweat dripping from her round stupid forehead onto her inch-thick nerd glasses.

The comments I submitted to the admissions office:

Plays violin. Is shy. Recommend? No.
My second interview went much better.

Cool Asian Chris. Confident. Intelligent. Varsity Tennis player. Video game lover.

I brought him to lunch. He ordered meatballs.

He received a GLOWING recommendation.

My comments:

Chris is a well-spoken, mature, confident, and extremely personable individual with a wide range of interests and obvious potential. If this kid isn't Brown material, I don't know what is.

I like alumni interviews. I feel like a god.

GODHEAD!!!!

Yesterday Bjoern took me on my first pro-photoshoot. He was shooting this band called GodHead.



Over the course of the incredibly awesome 5-hour shoot, I learned a shit-ton of new tricks, discovered a bunch of lofty light-filled locations to shoot people, and basically just got to see how a pro photographer directs people.

Bjoern described their music as cyber-techno-punk. I expected them to be totally creepy and that we'd be talking about drinking lamb blood and burning babies, but they turned out to be the nicest sweetest guys ever. The lead singer, Jason (the bald one), was actually really shy. We talked about Lost, 24, David LaChappelle, and how amazing the OC soundtrack is.

Playing in a punk band is only a side job for them and has been for 10 years. They make decent money and have put out 6 albums, but the guys all have side-jobs as Photoshop experts, voiceover artists, audio engineers, and real estate mini-moguls.

It made me realize that it really is all just a business and their creepy image is just part of their marketing. They're not in a band because they expect to be the next U2, they do it because they love it and that's what people do out here in LA because they can. There are just so many ways to make money creatively that you wouldn't have the opportunity to in any other city.

All the money that the band makes (which sometimes is and sometimes is not enough to live extremely comfortably off of) is deposited directly into their retirement accounts. They're not hardcore drug addicts or partiers. They have families!

And Bjoern got paid almost 2 G's for less than five hours of work.

I can't wait to be Bjoern.

Ashes & Snow!

Me: (discreetly) "Djimon Hounsou's over there..."
Kristy: "Who?"
Katie: "I don't know who that is."
Me: "Djimon Hounsou. He's in like Alias, and Gladiator, and Amistad..."
Kristy: "Where?"
Katie: "This wine is delicious!"
Natasha: "Let's do SHOTS!!!"
Me: "Right behind me. In the green cap..."
Kristy: (looks over)(pauses) "MINI CHEESE TARTS!!!!"

This was basically our night. We alternated between drinking wine, scanning the crowd for celebrities, and chasing down the little catering people for their assorted delights. Oh, and we also looked at the art.

Mini Cheese Tarts, Mini Mushroom Tarts, Grass-fed Steak and Caramelized Onion Mini Sandwiches, Curried Chicken Turnovers, Spinach and Gorgonzola Dumplings, Portabello Mushroom Pizza, Crostinis with Roasted Red Pepper and Goat Cheese, Carrot Souffle and Mashed Potatoes (served on mini spoons that the caterers would wait for you to eat off of and then take away), Mocha Cake w/ Creme Fraiche, Mini Cheesecake. Did I mention the Grass-fed Steak Sandwiches? MMMmmmm..... It was so very delicious.

And the art was great too.

And the bar.

Everything sold out immediately. Rolex bought every single piece for $250,000 EACH. There must have been at least 60 different pieces. Yeah. Insanity.

Basically they built this massive temporary structure called the "Nomadic Museum" that housed the entire exhibition, it's made entirely out of freight containers and canvas and they dismantle and rebuild it in every location that they travel to.



After it ends here in March, the exhibition will be traveling to Abu Dhabi, Paris, and other amazing places all over the world, and Brie gets to go with it!

Getting to go to events like this makes me feel a little less scared about going into photography because it it reminds me that no matter what I do, I'll always have fancy friends who are in all kinds of fancy industries and thus I will continue to be hooked up in many different arenas. Eventually somebody (or everybody) will have a use for my skills and someday I too will be sell my work for $250,000 a pop. So, I got the inspiration and motivation I was looking for.

Yay.

So anyway...the celebrities. Tash saw Lisa Kudrow. Katie saw Owen Wilson. Kristy saw Darryl Hannah. I missed all of these. Sadly. Didn't see Brad, Leo or Cher either. (The structure was enormous and we parted and reconvened several times.)

I did, however, see Djimon Hounsou, Sophie Okonedo (Hotel Rwanda, Aeon Flux), Lawrence Fishburne, and Christian Bale (in full beard). Quality sightings, definitely.

We also bumped in Bjoern. He was wasted out of his mind.



After the exhibition we popped over to Q's to meet up with the boys.



All in all, a very good night.

Bjoern's Xmas Card

This dude is awesome.

Photographry Lessons

So I spent the morning recovering from hangover and eating delicious Chineeeese food.

Around 4 I went in to work with Bjoern on some stuff. He spent an hour teaching me some lighting techniques by shooting me with my own camera. Basically we bounced a flash off a plain white wall to try to make it look like daylight. Photography is so cool.



After work I was driving past Westwood and decided to stop by Rach and Bri's to hang out. To my surprise I entered there apartment to find them sitting on the couch...with Bobby!

Yay. I am so happy when my friends connect.

And Bri is so sweet, she went to several liquor stores in Nevada looking for Honey Brown for me. (Honey Brown, my favoritest beer EVER, is rumored to be sold in Nevada but apparently these are LIES).

Rachael made me a Christmas CD that I'm sure I will be bopping along to for many days to come (I apologize in advance to any would-be passengers in my car).

My friends are so lovely.

I also got the sweetest voicemail ever from Del Smershio. Gershy, I love you more than life, and Los Angeles would never be the same without you.

Christmas love, one of the many reasons this time of year rocks.

More Bjoerny fun

Worked for Bjoern from noonish to now-ish today.

Ka-ching!

Working again tomorrow!

We drove around Hollywood posting his pictures everywhere and then taking pictures of them. (We can then later photoshop the real pictures we want to feature into the pictures.) It's a cool idea.

Below is one of the "desk" shots we took today using the tripod/camera/lighting setup we devised last night.



And now it's time to empty my wallet.

Partyyyyy!

Working for the man.

Bjoern is the man.

I love him and I can't wait until he becomes a bigshot fashion photographer and takes me with him.

We spent 7 hours last night brainstorming and setting up my camera to take supercool pictures to showcase his work. We came up with this brilliant idea of setting up a 9-foot tripod and taking a picture down onto a cluttered desk with his headshots lying all around.



Bjoern is so cool.

AND he just recently took pictures of Colby Donaldson from Survivor..

Colby is hot.

Bjoerny Bjoern: Day One

Went in to work for Bjoern today.

I worked out of his teeny little apartment. He has a living room, a bathroom, and a kitchen. He sleeps on a single-person futon in his living room. I guess he spends all his money on his horses.

So he had like 5 or 6 shoots over the weekend (6 x $600 = $3600!).

I helped him load all his selects in. Cropped. Rotated. Pretty simple stuff. I picked up a few new Photoshop shortcuts. Very very useful.

While the pics were loading I browsed around his apartment and found several items that gave me some insight into his personality and tastes.

Some things I found:

Hotel LaChappelle (David LaChappelle's amazing photo book)
Maxim (means he appreciates humor and sarcasm)
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (though I'm not really a fan, any grown man who reads Harry Potter has to be kind of cool)
X-Box (only fun people play video games)
Enrique Iglesias CD (ENRIQUE!!!)

Bottom line: I love Bjoern.

AND he paid me in cash.

Bjoern!

I start work on Monday.

He doesn't need a full-time assistant yet, but he interviewed me because he was flattered that I admired his work, and because he thinks he's at a tipping point where he's going to transition from being a headshot photographer to being a fashion photographer.

Right now he's going to pay me hourly to help him layout his new portfolio to submit around town.

He's the most amazing little man. He's a self-described spazz and talks a mile a minute in a German, but not annoying, accent. He was totally honest with me though, he was like, if you want to be a photographer, be a photographer, don't work as an assistant to a director or something like that when you can just buy a camera and get out there and shoot. I guess that's how he learned it all.

It would be nice to make some money though. And network with billionaires. I don't think it could ever hurt.

HMmmMmMMmMMM....